The Last Letter

It was almost the end of their relation. Nisha had given everything she could have to save it. She loves him so much and cant think of parting from him..But you cannot bind the relations. never... She waited for him to call. To say what he has to say finally. Nisha cried the whole day. "How could he do this? he too loves me a lot but why does he wants to go away from me? did I not love him enough? Had I been a bad girl friend?" .....endless questions keep filling her  mind and the answers were unknown..She was alone at home with nobody beside her to console,she felt like screaming but alas!

She has known him right from her school days. She adored him.He was a brilliant student. Very humble,down to earth ,quiet and a great friend.She could not help loving him and as the days passed by their friendship turned into a relation--a love relation. He too loves her and she is the only person in the whole world whom he loves so dearly. But there were other things too by which he was bound.

At around 2pm the calling bell rang. Nisha opened the door and found a postman. He gave him a letter. On it her name was written with blue ink. The handwriting seemed familiar. She wondered "who on this earth would send him the letter?"She opened the envelope. Inside was a letter written by her boyfriend.

"Dear Nisha

I know what you must be feeling right now. Trust me I am feeling much worse than you. I dont have the courage to say it over the phone so I am writing it. I know u love me much more than I could have loved u. You never asked anything in return. And I  have been  a very bad boy friend who has never lived upto ur expectation.

It is very painful for me to say that I have to end our relation here only. It was the most beautiful relation which has taught me to grow in life. I know I will never be happy again as my happiness lies in u. I know I will never be able to love anyone again as my only love is u. But I cant explain u the situation for which I am saying this. May be we were not destined to be together.

I might not survive long as it is utterly painful for me too to survive without u. I want the very best of u.I wish u a very happy life and I know whoever comes to ur life will keep u happy. Everyone is not like me.

I know u must be thinking that I am a coward. Yes I am a coward. I cant fight with my family. I cant see my mother committing suicide in front of me. No. I love u too much and cant bear to hear anything ugly spoken to u after our marriage. If possible dont misunderstand me. I am being forced to do this. I promise I will never be back in ur life. U will not see me again.

This is my last letter to u. I wish u all the very best for ur future. Be happy.Keep smilling my angel and forgive me.

I know God will never forgive me for what I have done and I deserve that. I deserve to die as its because of me all problems are being created.

I love u  always.

Bye

Raj"

Nisha laid  on the floor crying like anything with the letter clutching towards her heart. And uttered a little prayer "Oh God! Why?Why did u do this to me?"

There are some love stories in life which ends despite the two people loving each other madly. They end because of some unavoidable sequences that accompanies a person since their birth. The  question though still remains...."WHY IS IT SO?"..And the answer.....unknown.

New life

After a much waiting I finally got a job in an MNC. At first I didnt let my joy override other things. But the joy turned into a little sadness as I asked to join in Chennai. Again away from my house I had to live. I somehow made up my mind as we cant get everything together. A sacrifice has to be there..So I packed by bags and set out for a new journey..

Chennai is a nice city.. My office ...nicer.. Proudly wearing the office tag I used to go to the office everyday. My roommates are mostly my schoolmates but never my close friends. We stayed together. The past 4 years of hostel life has taught me a  lot of lessons that I needed now. I became more adjusting to everything. My training centre though was different from all of them. It was in the central part of Chennai. Everyday I had to get up at 6 am and get ready for my office. I had to travel a lot,changing trains twice on my way. After so many years of study here comes another academy and lots of exams.. Oh God! When will these things end..Now we are working ..Still an academy? Still exams?? How many more times do we have to prove ourselves??---A question that was asked by every new joinee.

My batch consisted of 30 people.. At first I didnt know any of them except my best friend Arnab and a friend Amrit. Slowly I befriended everyone. There were many a time when I used to feel bad at the others comments. I always had Arnab to guide me. He protected me from all possible dangers. It was as if everyone fresh passout from engineering colleges and a somewhat similar environment prevailed. Nobody felt like working in an mnc.

Slowly I found out a few lobies has been created. There was one group which consisted of 2 girls and 2 boys. We used to laugh at them as the girls never became friends to others. There was another boy involved with one of the girls but everything became complicated....Its always hard to recognize people's character.

There were 5 people from hyderabad.. Though all of them were very good yet there was one girl who was backdated in every respect.  Sometimes it was irritating in the way she used to react to every words. But nevertheless we were friends.

A group of 2 boys and 1 girl..All of them Bengali--quite nice and all of them used to say in the same place.A group consisting of me,arnab and amrit. There was a nepali boy who had a very good sense of humor,and many bengalis..Most remarkable was Mr confucious...Always confused at what being taught.Never used to understand jokes and people never stopped from pulling his leg.

The academy days were really fun. The andhrites and a couple of bengali boy got chennai itself as their deployment location. We felt nostalgic for them as it was as if the whole batch is going to split and we may not be able to see each other again.

We are still waiting for our deployment. In the while many couples has been formed and of course my best friend too likes someone. But with the end of academy I fear his short love story will take an end.Till then its just enjoying the present not considering the future.

Now I dont want to live in Chennai not because I have any problems but because I want to go back to my hometown. But I am sure I will miss Chennai ,miss my roommates,my academy days...

But Chalna hi zindagi hain.........................................I have still a long way to go..

Emotional Fool

This is what people opine about me ---- an Emotional Fool. A person who cares for the little emotions which nobody cares. Actually my world is very little , I have a very few close friends whom I call my God gifted friends. They do for me like no one does,they care for me like no one cares . It was being taught to me not to expect anything from anyone , not to take every word to ur heart, not to care for emotions... But my question is are these criteria s fit in the case of closed ones too?? Aren't they suppose to know u better than everyone around u? Is it a crime to  speak out to them if anything u didnt like? If it is then whom to call closed ones? If not then y is that they dont take it the way u feel? Why is it that someone's feelings are never understood? Why is it someone is always wrong in saying something?


Probably the only answer is that "This is life". U may be too lucky to have people to understand evry bit of ur emotion or too less fortunate  not to get anyone..Everyone says its all becoz u think so much , u take every word to heart...How does it matter to u ? Why are u being an emotional fool? Emotional fool....To live u have to make sure that u care for evryone's  but also be sure that no one cares for u. Be careful to what to say but dont be harsh or rude if u r angry(this applies in the case of ur loved ones too.as loved ones are very easily hurt and many a times never understand what made u say like that).


If the life involves in an IT sector then simply dont give a dam to anything anyone says. Sometimes I do wonder is it a crime to be an extrovert? Once a friend of mine claimed that by being just a  friend he knows everything about me just becoz i am an extrovert...But I kept on thinking have I done anything wrong so that I need to hide it from people? Many think it to be "not that good".But where is the fault ???


Actually these things are taught in numerous management books,television programs etc. But in a world where even ur loved ones dont care for u  u cant afford to be an Emotional fool..